All posts by JD

I am an author, artist, journalist, activist, and most importantly, I am an Individual, with my own voice, my own will and my own ideas.

Grammar Cops

By: JD Author, Reporter-Journalist

The way you just corrected my grammar has changed

My life forever.

 Said No One Ever!.

Today I was quite tickled when I received an email from one of my blog followers and I felt like sharing it with you.  I also hope it will  enlighten people on etiquette when it comes to correcting someone on their grammar, punctuation or use of sentence structure.  I for one know I am not perfect when it comes to writing.  I will be the first to admit that I have gone back several times and re-read articles that I had written years before and scratched my head, wondering Did I ever proof read that?? Punctuation and I have a love-hate relationship often. The reason it was amusing you ask… Because in their email, they had 4 spelling errors, multiple inappropriate uses of pronouns and terrible punctuation. Pot meet Kettle!

I try to make it a habit not to throw the same grammar Nazi stones at fellow bloggers, because I know how irritating it is when other people (especially the narcissist who thinks they are smarter than everyone else) corrects mine every chance they get.  Sure I appreciate when a close friend suggests I proof-read something, but sheesh (yes, not a real word according to spell check), must you call attention to it EVERY TIME??


Yes, it is true (don’t faint despite your shock).  When you tend to correct someone often, you think you are being helpful, when in all reality you’re (I was so tempted to put your here) being annoying. It may be true that you want to show off your skills and intellect, but you’re really showing me how much a smug party-pooper you are.  So to keep from making other bloggers or social media guru’s feel belittled, just celebrate their creativity and expression.  They are after all, bold enough to embrace the writing creativity they have, on a global platform.  Some of us put ourselves out there for the world to see because it is healing, relaxing, or just a medium for coping with life’s everyday happenings.

So the next time you surf the internet, troll social media or read someone’s adorable but misspelled meme, try to remember a few simple alternatives;

Embrace the persons creativity. We live in the real world, so be real. Even with the crap spelling and grammatical errors, you must not be so naive as to not grasp what the post was TRYING to say or represent, correct?  Embrace the meaning or the spirit and intent behind the post instead of the errors.

Choose to ignore it.  Ignore the post and say nothing.  You can always take Thumper’s advice. If you can’t say something nice don’t say anything.  Hide it.  The joy of social media is the ability to un-follow or hide posts we do not care to see without using the remove friend option. someone. This choice works well when you sit on such a high pedestal that you just can’t seem to function unless you chastise someone you know who is of a lesser ability than you (please be careful not to fall off your throne as literary scholars are not obituary column writers).

If you feel like you can’t let it go, and you just do not want to always have  to hide certain posts, you may just have to not engage in reading anything certain people write, blog, or meme others with.  I have had to do this myself, but not for grammar.  I tend to only hide rude hate speech or narrow minded racists.  I even block or try to un-see emails, posts and blogs that bash overweight people calling other people fat, because obviously those groups of people have never taken a good look in a mirror in a while.  I despise racist rants as well.  Nothing like a Caucasian thinking a black person is a welfare leech or a black person thinking all Caucasians are racist, or beggars are all alcoholics that choose to be homeless.

You need to assess the value of your friendship or acquaintance to this individual or individuals. This is especially true if you know that the person posting believes strongly in what they have shared.  A good scenario would be perhaps an individual feels that cola is better than coffee.  That person feels that cola is the ONLY alternative to water, and that is some twisted way has magical powers that can make them feel and look younger (don’t we wish). Maybe they even believe that you will age way faster drinking coffee and that soda is the only fountain of youth and that if you drink a bunch you might even have magical powers and be able to fly? After you re-read, scratch your head in disbelief, and before you respond; think to yourself, are you going to convert this person?  Are they really going to listen to the voice of YOUR reasoning?  Although we sure hope no one is nuts enough to believe that cola would do this, the point is, everyone has an opinion or idea, and it is NOT our place to judge the validity in a condescending manner.

Obviously, you can see the delusion in their belief.  There are more than enough facts out there to tell you it is Pixie Dust, that can make you fly; but only after drinking RedBull that gives you wings!  You could show them countless children’s books and movies to help them see the error of their ways.  They are wrong. SO WRONG.   BUT….If you know they feel strongly, and you aren’t likely to sway their opinion – then ask yourself which is more important:  being right or your friendship.  If your friendship is more valuable, ignore it and embrace their quirkiness.  People are very sensitive about the things they believe strongly in. No one wants to have something they believe so strongly in disproved publicly on social media.  A debate simply between cola and coffee could end up costing your friendship.

I have actually experienced someone emailing me a meme they saw on one of their friends social media along with a rude comment about how stupid the individual was.  Seriously?  I wanted to send a message back to them asking them if it made them feel better to belittle someone they had on their “friends” list like that.  Or better yet, how about I tell them my opinion of one of their posts recently that was? How shall I put this? In all their intelligence, they post some really stupid stuff themselves.  Yet I am respectful and do not comment or reply.  I electively ignore it, or when it is an email just delete it.  Here is how I would deal with social media things I don’t agree with or memes that are utterly stupid (my opinion).

I would never try to be passive, aggressive.  I would make it a point to never write a post or share a meme on my own wall about misspelled memes or comments. My acquaintance or friend would know it was about him/her and it would hurt their feelings.  We need to always try and remember that some people take their beliefs seriously and it could be seen as an attack. Remember how strongly you felt about their meme? They will feel the same about yours.

I would NEVER take the original meme, alter or correct it and submit it as a comment. This usually hurts their feelings and they might perceive it as me being an ass or a show-off know-it-all.

If you disagree with the message, don’t write several posts in a row linking web pages and urls to prove the original poster wrong. That’s just plain insensitive and you’re being an ass!  It could be viewed as an aggressive attack or assault on their character and your lack of.  There are times when you can politely disagree on social media. Maybe it isn’t an issue your friend is passionate about, and it is just info she/he shared.  Even I am known to post things I may disagree with just to ask people for their opinions or to hear other peoples interpretations and open up a discussion on different points of view.


If you are dead set on pointing out someone’s misguidance’s or flaws, because you’re just the type of person who cannot seem to survive without finding the negative in everything, be careful how you do it.  Yes, even I have one or two of those type of friends.  They must ALWAYS find a negative in near every circumstance.  But I have learned to brush it off and accept them for who they are, and respect their opinion (I just eye roll).


The best approach is to ask questions.  You could ask if it is an open topic and would they mind if you shared what you have read or know. You could start by saying; “I’ve seen this meme shared before, but I feel it is misleading. Would you like me to share an article about it?”  If you’re friend says “No” then ignore or hide the post.  If its an email or instant message just move along to another topic or hit delete button on the email.  If they are open to discussion and say  “yes”, then politely share the article.  Share one article/post at a time and give your friend a chance to reply before posting more information.

LAST, but certainly NOT least consider this; What if YOU are the one who is always having your posts, comments, emails, or instant messages corrected?Most  people I know love to be right.  Just remember, sometimes – always being right can sometimes be socially wrong.





©Copyright protected 2017: NWU Local 1981

©IAPP Author/Journalist Press ID # 1007490467


When Reality Hits you in the face

By: JD Author, Reporter-Journalist

I try to always look at the positive in life, be thankful for everything I have because so many people have so little.  Although I have not always made the wisest of choices when it comes to what is best medically, nutritionally and physically for living with Hypermobility Spectrum Disorder, Ehlers-Danlos and Progressive Muscular Atrophy, yet the effort is there.  Focusing on the good things in my life has been a goal of mine, but today.. all positive fled my thoughts and I found myself feeling broken and alone.

I have stuck with six weeks of physical therapy despite the frequent visits to the hospital for interventional medications to slow the severe pain in my head that affects my optic nerves and causes me to lose my sight.  But today, September 26,2017, was totally different.  It was evaluation day.  The therapist, who is polite, has a great sense of humor, and jokes with me the whole time I fight through pain and do my therapy, actually had me hating him when I left.

I know that sounds quite odd for me to not just brush things off and joke around or look at the funnier side of my medical craziness, but this time, I was not laughing on the inside.  I was screaming, crying and just wanting to give up.  I fight hard to stay positive, but the only thing I could see positive was being able to flee Knapp Physical Therapy, and try not to lose my composure in the process.  Why the drastic change?

Well anyone with a medical condition or disease like Ehlers-Danlos, Hypermobility Spectrum, or ACM (my tri-fecta), you know there is no cure, and it just progresses at its will.  So today I sat there as David, my therapist did my strength and agility testing, and informs me that I totally suck.  Of course those are not his words, but they might as well been, because that’s how I heard it.  He tells me that I was a 0/5 in some things I should be able to do, but couldn’t.

The only thing that ran through my mind was

                   just a few years back this “not agile, weak” body rode 160 miles in a bike marathon for the Multiple Sclerosis Foundation,

and this ass is telling me that I am basically a human noodle??

Do you know how hard it is to chuckle lightly and smile when you really want to just scream and beat the crap out of someone, something, anything?  You’re so angry.  You know you have been trying and despite the pain, you do your best, and it means nothing??   That is me, this is my day, today I felt like, and still feel like I am an epic failure. I know I am not, but knowing it doesn’t change the feeling.

Of course as soon as my appointment was over, David says, “we will start strengthening as much as we can what muscles still work.  I agree with him just to be complacent for the moment.

My mind is now in the fight or flight mode and the flight is at 90%.  I am fighting hard not to just give up.  I am so tired of trying and getting nowhere.  I am battling that voice in my head that is telling me it is time to quit, I am done!  I have loads of family and friends who always tell me they support me and to fight.  Right about now I want to yell at them too!  Because how would they even understand what I am going through!  They don’t walk in my shoes.  about now I almost want to tell then to just shut  up and go away.

I think I just need a good long nights sleep, then I can reevaluate how I feel tomorrow.  Perhaps tomorrow my “get up and go” will be side by side with me, walking with me, motivating me.  But for today, I have no idea where it went.

I need to wake up tomorrow and hopefully find my strength, because that is all I have.

©Copyright protected 2017: NWU Local 1981

©IAPP Author/Journalist Press ID # 1007490467